Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Cat

Cat, n. A soft, indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.

This is a dog,
This is a cat.
This is a frog,
This is a rat.
Run, dog, mew, cat.
Jump, frog, gnaw, rat.
Elevenson

2006 Update: Rejection in a rabbit skin.

Announcement! Now is the time for all good men and women to come to the aid of the Pia. You can now vote for Pia for a Koufax Award for best writing by a lefty blogger. Click here. It's good for you.

25 comments:

Chatham said...

EXCUSE meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!?!?

Cat: that deity that is as likely to scratch you as purr.

*hrmpf*

Unknown said...

i would say something but the cat got my tongue

Tom & Icy said...

Cats are okay as long as they stay out of my territory.

Anonymous said...

Cat,n. Fuzzy indifference.

Doug The Una said...

You heard me, Chatcat, and Walela scratches me just fine, thank you.

Little Bar of Christopher, amen.

Karma, it helpsif you don't lick mice.

Elton John! Well done, Shayna!

Hear! Hear! Icy! Good girl!

Good definition, Duxfine.

Lila said...

Hmpf!

Why are so many people so anti-cat?

Don't you know that "cat" spelled backwards is "tac"?

Cat, n. Master of its domain, and yours too.

Sar said...

Congratulations, Doug. Between yesterday's and today's posts, you have successfully transformed my intellectual playground into a dog blog. My Sasha says "hisssssss".

And I say I'm too sexy for my cat.

Doug The Una said...

Purrrrfect definition, Aral (it was bound to happen.) Why are so many cats anti-person?

Cowgirl, it's my job here. But I commend you on a kinder, gentler but still funny definition.

A cat is not a dog, Sar, Willie will have you know and probably Chatcat too. Well done on a very funny, clever and entirely inappropriate last line.

Miz BoheMia said...

Meow! What's up with all the pussy cat haters?

Cat~ the vavoom and oomph behind my alter ego Catty Yummy Mummy. Behave or else... K-kish!

Meow baby, MEOW!

Jay Noel said...

Cat: very much conditional love

Miz BoheMia said...

Cat... mysterious creatures who shall reveal themselves only to those who are willing to open their eyes...

Cat... multiply by 5 and they make up a village that raised a bohemian to her shocked state of womanhood...

Sar said...

But you see Doug, coming on the heels of yesterday's word and subsequent dialog, you've solidified your site as a dog blog by your reducing cats in favor of dogs today.

And I'm still too sexy for my cat.

Indeterminacy said...

Cats: successful musicals.

As opposed to dogs: unsuccessful musicals.

Forgive me.

Doug The Una said...

Meow, Miz B!

Absolutely, Phoenix.

Cats can be reduced, Sar? Which wine would you use?

Indie, I'll forgive you your partisanship if you'll go back and read Saturday's story. Sheesh.

Et tu, Cowgirl?

Jamie Dawn said...

The best kind of cat is one who thinks it's a dog.

We had one like that once. Best cat we ever had on the ranch.

Minka said...

cat, a true testiment to the ideology that not everything in nature has a function

Minka said...

Ok, that was kinda mean!

let me try again:

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through the snow. -- Jeff Valdez

Dogs come when called. Cats take a message and get back to you.

Minka said...

MEOW-SPLAT-WOOF-SPLAT

hey, it´s raining cats and dogs!

Minka said...

I am so tired :)

Alana said...

I don't dislike cats, but I have to say that I believe they prove that animals can have schizophrenia or autsim. No offence to anyone with those diagnosis's (as they are many of my favorite people) or to cats, but I do find that there can be some strange similarities at times....if you don't believe me, you might need to do more observation.

Doug The Una said...

Jamie Dawn When I was 2 I used to ride our cat, Sam. The BEST kind of cat thinks it's a horse.

Yes, Minka, give it to me. Cruelty to cats is revenge for our sisters and brothers who have them. And let's talk about Derrick and Harry. What mercy would be shown them?

Cowgirl, chickens make cats seem sweet. At least cats don't usually eat each other.

Haha, Actonbell. You're so SMART!!!!

Squaregirl, I'll accept your hypothesis if it can be proven that autism is a choice.

Anonymous said...

YAY!!
We LOVE this definition
(snicker snicker)!
We love Dogtist filth and and we love Doug!!

Doug The Una said...

Thank you, Ariella and Logo. I knew you'd understand.

Ariel the Thief said...

"Women and cats will do as they please. Men and dogs had better get used to it." Robert Heinlein

a late quote :-)

Doug The Una said...

That's awesome, Ariel! My humility as a dog requires me to put aside my bias as a man.