Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Monday, August 20, 2007
Kilt
KILT, n. A costume sometimes worn by Scotchmen in America and Americans in Scotland.
2007 Update: A skirt worn by men to display tribal pride.
You are chosen to represent your country in the first international blog WUB (World United Bloggers)
The aim of this blog is to prove to the world that differences in language, religion,race and nationality do not make us hate each other and we can make this world better if we express our opinions with respect to others.
If you agree to join us please send e-mail with your nick name , age , country and your blog address to sharm_lover@hotmail.com where you will be sent an activation mail which makes you entitled to contribute in WUB, your name as one of the contributor will automatically be updated.Please read the rules before you start any posting in WUB where you will also find the aims of this WUB.
A kilt is something Doug won't wear to represent our part of the blog world in the WUB which sounds like a world security agency
I always knew you were a spy for something. Just didn't know you were really working for Prince Charles, and am glad to find out that he's actually worked
KILT, n. Another sad but instructive example of the importance of correct typography.
Y'see, once upon a time, there was this edition of Sir Walter Scott's poetry that was prepared for sale in Scotland, which contained the line,
"She spoke with a lilt".
Trouble was, the typesetter mistakenly substituted a "k" for the first "l". And the rest is, as they say (and of course, you know who they are).
Apropos of nothing, I find that the word "lilt" is derived from the middle English LULTEN, v.t.: to sound an alarm. I can only think: bagpipes? Which is a very kilty thing to do.
Having served 3 years in a Scottish Highland Regiment, I have to make a few corrections about the kilt assumptions. A kilt is about as free as that bird ever gets to be in public. It's the sporran that keeps it all hidden and in place.
Sporran: The decorative pouch warn by a strap around the waist used to hold the front of a kilt still on windy days.
Sorry to change you word definition yet again Doug.
"You are chosen to represent your country in the first international blog WUB (World United Bloggers)." Your mama must be so proud. I know your blogmama is.
As someone entitled to wear plaids associated with the Grahams and the McKnights, I'll risk this: A kilt is the only thing between a sporran filled with money and a Scotsman's next most precious possessions.
KILT should actually be: K.I.L.T. -- The original name of the garment has been lost to history, but the current name is an acronym derived from the initials written on the purchase vouchers of men ordering said garment: Keep it long, Tailor.
"How grand the human race would be If every man would wear a kilt, A flirt of Tartan finery, Instead of trousers, custom built! Nay, do not think I speak to joke: (You know I'm not that kind of man), I am convinced that all men folk. Should wear the costume of a Clan.
Imagine how it's braw and clean As in the wind it flutters free; And so conducive to hygiene In its sublime simplicity. No fool fly-buttons to adjust,-- Wi' shanks and maybe buttocks bare; Oh chiels, just take my word on trust, A bonny kilt's the only wear.
'Twill save a lot of siller too, (And here a canny Scotsman speaks), For one good kilt will wear you through A half-a-dozen pairs of breeks. And how it's healthy in the breeze! And how it swings with saucy tilt! How lassies love athletic knees Below the waggle of a kilt!
True, I just wear one in my mind, Since sent to school by Celtic aunts, When girls would flip it up behind, Until I begged for lowland pants. But now none dare do that to me, And so I sing with lyric lilt,-- How happier the world would be If every male would wear a kilt!"
33 comments:
kilt,n. egg-warmer
kilt, n. a vine for grasshoppers and other crawly insects without wings
kilt: An easy way to moon your audience (as in Braveheart.)
kilt: Woven feathers to cover a bird.
kilt, n. a cage, trapping something at flight risk?
kilt: a skirt worn by men to display tribal pride, and occasionally, the family jewels.
Kilt~ Past tense of the verb kill
"He was so upset, it nearly kilt him!"
Here in Seattle we have the proud purveyors of the Utilikilt, the tribal pride of a new generation.
Minka, you kilt with that first one!
Doug, if this has anything to do with "Leviathans", you are SO gonna get kilt, yourself. (just sayin'...) ; )
okay, now i'm just laughing at ALL the definitions above me. too funny!
Kilt: means for men to "skirt" the "issues". ["Iss you?" "Yes...this one iss, too!"]
Hi there,
You are chosen to represent your country in the first international blog
WUB (World United Bloggers)
The aim of this blog is to prove to the world that differences in language, religion,race and nationality do not make us hate each other and we can make this world better if we express our opinions with respect to others.
If you agree to join us please send e-mail with your nick name , age , country and your blog address to sharm_lover@hotmail.com where you will be sent an activation mail which makes you entitled to contribute in WUB, your name as one of the contributor will automatically be updated.Please read the rules before you start any posting in WUB where you will also find the aims of this WUB.
Thanks
Chief WUB,
Sharm .
www.worlub.blogspot.com
Kilt...a nice way to show off your knees...what did you think I was going to say? Anyway all the good ones already used...that just kilt me.
Kilt: something to make women wonder...does he or doesn't he wear anything under it?
A kilt is something Doug won't wear to represent our part of the blog world in the WUB which sounds like a world security agency
I always knew you were a spy for something. Just didn't know you were really working for Prince Charles, and am glad to find out that he's actually worked
Boy, Minka. Men in skirts sure brings out the funny in you.
Nessa, I wondered where the cawing was coming from.
Maybe in Scotland, Minka.
To sheep, Mutha?
Logo, "Lord God he done kilt hisself!" is my favorite line of dialogue from Cormac McCarthy's Outer Dark. The other one wasn't as funny.
Neva, I intended no such thing, nor have I ever helped my sister write a funny and entertaining book about such things.
Welcome, Sharm. How come your URL doesn't work?
Mo'a I prefer veterinary cones for that.
TLP, real men don't make women wonder.
True, Pia. I was thinking blue jeans and a wire.
Kilt: Eating with reckless abandon "I kilt that container of ice cream, I hope it didn't blow my cover"
KILT, n. Another sad but instructive example of the importance of correct typography.
Y'see, once upon a time, there was this edition of Sir Walter Scott's poetry that was prepared for sale in Scotland, which contained the line,
"She spoke with a lilt".
Trouble was, the typesetter mistakenly substituted a "k" for the first "l". And the rest is, as they say (and of course, you know who they are).
Apropos of nothing, I find that the word "lilt" is derived from the middle English LULTEN, v.t.: to sound an alarm. I can only think: bagpipes? Which is a very kilty thing to do.
Oh, so many things to be said, having myself come from the Scotch-Irish descent... but what comes to mind is this great ditty "The Scotman Song" (What Is Under The Kilt)
You can sing along.
OE, I bet secret agents have to be real careful with ice cream.
Amoeba, I did not know that.
Terry, normally I would sing along but in this life I'm tone deaf.
Kilt: A costume worn by, not coincidentally, brawlers and drinkers.
kilt: ...or hide the family jewels.
Minka kilted us all with her definition today - good one!
Um that was "kilt" us all.
Having served 3 years in a Scottish Highland Regiment, I have to make a few corrections about the kilt assumptions. A kilt is about as free as that bird ever gets to be in public. It's the sporran that keeps it all hidden and in place.
Sporran: The decorative pouch warn by a strap around the waist used to hold the front of a kilt still on windy days.
Sorry to change you word definition yet again Doug.
"You are chosen to represent your country in the first international blog WUB (World United Bloggers)." Your mama must be so proud. I know your blogmama is.
WUB, Women for Unlimited Boobs
uh Doug, I think some people misread your definiton for today? (was a funny one, anyway!)
As someone entitled to wear plaids associated with the Grahams and the McKnights, I'll risk this: A kilt is the only thing between a sporran filled with money and a Scotsman's next most precious possessions.
Doug: Always with the Sheep! What is it with you ranch hands??
Oh, I'm sure you could make a lovely accompaniment Doug; everyone knows a beagle makes beautiful music when he/she bays.
KILT should actually be: K.I.L.T. -- The original name of the garment has been lost to history, but the current name is an acronym derived from the initials written on the purchase vouchers of men ordering said garment: Keep it long, Tailor.
"Tribal pride" - tee hee, har dee har, hee haw!!
I kilt me a possum the other day. Runned him over.
Anonymous, I suppose exposure to breezes brings out the worst in a fella.
G, kilted is the way past participle, maybe.
That's ok, Morgan. I didn't edit but thanks for the info. I'm honored to have a veteran in a dress on my site.
TLP, did you weep too?
Ariel, can men join?
Weirsdo, you can hide a bottle of whiskey there too?
Haha, Mutha. Are you detecting a trend? Lord, but I hope not.
Terry, the coyotes find my singing pretty, it's true.
Quilly, now that's funny. They'd have done better sending the note to their maker.
Did ye mash on the speed brake, JD?
"How grand the human race would be
If every man would wear a kilt,
A flirt of Tartan finery,
Instead of trousers, custom built!
Nay, do not think I speak to joke:
(You know I'm not that kind of man),
I am convinced that all men folk.
Should wear the costume of a Clan.
Imagine how it's braw and clean
As in the wind it flutters free;
And so conducive to hygiene
In its sublime simplicity.
No fool fly-buttons to adjust,--
Wi' shanks and maybe buttocks bare;
Oh chiels, just take my word on trust,
A bonny kilt's the only wear.
'Twill save a lot of siller too,
(And here a canny Scotsman speaks),
For one good kilt will wear you through
A half-a-dozen pairs of breeks.
And how it's healthy in the breeze!
And how it swings with saucy tilt!
How lassies love athletic knees
Below the waggle of a kilt!
True, I just wear one in my mind,
Since sent to school by Celtic aunts,
When girls would flip it up behind,
Until I begged for lowland pants.
But now none dare do that to me,
And so I sing with lyric lilt,--
How happier the world would be
If every male would wear a kilt!"
Robert W. Service
manskirt extraordinary.
Cooper, that's a perfect find.
It's not a dress!
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