Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Homiletics

HOMILETICS, n. The science of adapting sermons to the spiritual needs, capacities and conditions of the congregation.
So skilled the parson was in homiletics
That all his normal purges and emetics
To medicine the spirit were compounded
With a most just discrimination founded
Upon a rigorous examination
Of tongue and pulse and heart and respiration.
Then, having diagnosed each one's condition,
His scriptural specifics this physician
Administered — his pills so efficacious
And pukes of disposition so vivacious
That souls afflicted with ten kinds of Adam
Were convalescent ere they knew they had 'em.
But Slander's tongue — itself all coated — uttered
Her bilious mind and scandalously muttered
That in the case of patients having money
The pills were sugar and the pukes were honey.
—Biography of Bishop Potter
2008 Update:  The art of inspiring submission to the will of God, by turning it on a stranger.

I know I started with L-words, but Jim distracted me.

17 comments:

karma said...

here's another H word:

Ha!

You know why, doncha?

TLP said...

Homiletics: Hey folks, it's a real word!!!! Who knew?

I should have known since I've heard the word homily all my life.

Good job Doug. I'm gettin' ed-u-cated here.

Another H word: HITONIOUS
JD has the definition.

amhsirak rian said...

Probably the art of making people think they don't know what they already know and have always known

pia said...

we could use a bit more of whatever the word was and a bit less somethng else Or maybe it's the opposite

It's a very long anc confusing way to describe a homily which is a nice and comforting word

Ariel the Thief said...

Wow Amshirak! Well said.

Anonymous said...

rant and rave,to pursue others that war , murder are simply acts of the will of god ,hence man has no responsibility to these acts , just following orders---thankful the will of god sends me here ,to rant and rave............Another Day In Paradise--Rocking In The Free World :-)

quilly said...

HOMILETICS n.
An abbreviation of the phrase "home lectures", however they are no longer -- and haven't been for sometime -- given in the home. The best part of these lectures is that one can sleep through them without recourse (something the parents never would have allowed). The bad part is that sleeping through them often leads to strange and unusual dreams. While the truly amazing part is that people actually get up on a Sunday (or Saturday) morning early, dress appropriately for their venue of choice, and deliberately attend these lectures.

Jim said...

Hey Doug, thank you a lot! I was really surprised when I came to peek over here. (Adi and I just returned from our walk.)
I'm doing the "H's" of four or more syllables that appeal to me.
Thanks too for posting all of Bierce's whole message. I liked the poem but it was too long to put in with other stuff I had today. Besides my readers are more towards being "sow's ears" like me (Jamie Dawn and Doug excepted).

Homiletics: For once a 'hom word' that we may not have to be careful of. [i.e. there are mostly homo words, very few homi ones.]

Homiletics: I'd rather have store bought letics than trust the homibodies to make these for me.
..

the amoeba said...

HOMILETICS, n. The amazing process of preparing dried corn for consumption. It's the grits ...

OK. So I can't spell this early in the morning.

I thought I'd seen, somewhere in my travels, a journal with this title. I was wrong. There are several of them. You'd think that preaching was something important.

actonbell said...

I didn't know this word, either. Sounds like a medical condition, such as becoming suddenly tired when forced to get up and leave home for work.

Jamie Dawn said...

Thanks to TLP for her usage of my H word, hitonious.
That was not hitonious at all for her to do that.
She is very non-hitonious.

Homiletics: sounds like hominy to me, and I love hominy.

The "pukes" in that poem made me chuckle.
I've heard many pukes over the years. Some have inspired me to repent of my iniquities and others caused me to dream of the pot roast in the oven.

Tom & Icy said...

I wish you could set aside one day a week for simple words.

Anonymous said...

What no Wednesday "the word"--OK,holiday time .......Peace

tsduff said...

Good - there is no word yet for today. I'm with Tom & Icy - simple minds like simple words.

Simple: bird-brained

Doug said...

Why, Karma! Are you first?

It is a real word, TLP, but I'm using it as a parable.

I thought so, Amhsirak.

Pia, once there came a preacher. No one understood him, so he spoke instead in homilies. See?

Proud, Ariel? Rightly so.

Anonymous, spiritual kick-the-can?

Quilly, I keep dreaming of a fig tree.

You're welcome, Jim. I think of you more in the silk purse category.

Amoeba, preaching is a popular hobby.

Actonbell, I'm used to the phrase "barn sour" for that condition.

JD, that was funny.

Icy, I'm afraid it's getting harder and harder to choose words, but I'll look for a simple one tomorrow.

Peace, Bear.

Tweet, Terry.

cooper said...

HOMILETICS n.

I skipped this yesterday because it was too difficult.

Hasn't changed much today.

Hobbes said...

Fits and seizures of morality?