Friday, June 05, 2009

Diamond

DIAMOND, n. A worthless stone, too soft to be given to a beggar in place of bread and too small to knock him down with.

2009 Update: As romantic a rock as romance is sincere a whimsy.

16 comments:

Jim said...

Diamond -- Since I'm first today I will say "Diamonds are a girl's best friend(s)."
..

Tom & Icy said...

It puts the zing in bling.

Mo'a said...

There is imitators out there...without the blood.

TLP said...

Ohhh...love the update.

Well, since I'm a female I am attracted to shiny objects, even though I realize that diamonds have no real value.

Okay. You talked me into it. Go ahead and send me rubys and pearls instead.

TLP said...

That should have been rubies. Because I did mean plural.

the amoeba said...

DIAMOND, n. ESPN's symbol for steroids, Barry ... er, Sammy ... er, Manny.

Too soft to give a beggar in place of bread? Weird - since diamond is the hardest mineral known to humankind. Either Bierce was being even more blunt-instrument ironic than usual or he lost an argument with a linotyper.

quilly said...

DIAMOND n. bride price

Jamie Dawn said...

Diamonds are sparkly and pricey. If you find one at the Diamond state park in Murfreesboro, AR, you get to keep it! Every now and then, someone finds a biggie!
I'm not a woman who has to have bling in order to be happy. I have a lot of cheap jewelry which shines just as brightly as the real stuff. Of course, I wouldn't throw away a huge diamond ring or anything.
I remember going to San Fran's Exploratorium years ago before The Reverend and I had kids. They had this laser thing they could point at diamonds to show if they were real or not. The real ones would reflect all kinds of lights all around the room, and the fake ones wouldn't do anything. Before they checked my wedding ring, I said to The Reverend, "This is the moment of truth."
My ring shined, and The Reverend breathed a sigh of relief.

:-)

karen said...

WHIMSY, n. An odd or fanciful notion.

Jientje said...

oooh, but they are FOREVER! Can't believe nobody has said that yet!!

Love the comments!

Ariel the Thief said...

Diamond, a piece of rock with airs.

Doug said...

Jim, fidelity to your gender requires that you say they are the devil's manicurist.

And the fling in everything, Icy.

It's true, Mo'a. Zirconium wars are generally fought at the local level.

TLP, they should have been delivered by now. Did you check under the ceramic turtle?

Amoeba, I'm guessing intent. 400 times the hardness of talc, right?

Well, yeah, Quilly, one of them.

A happy Reverend, JD, no doubt. I knew you were more of a truffle gal.

Karen, as in using Webster's definition here?

Jientje, note Jim's comment above. He gets the claim but you get whatever's mined.

Haha, Ariel. Right, a lump of coal.

karen said...

Webster's dictionary isn't allowed here? That's not very welcoming. No wonder I'm only the second of my tribe to comment here.

Doug said...

Everything is allowed here Karen, except profanity (for which the standard is anything worse than sonofabitch.) Particularly, giving people a hard time is allowed and encouraged.

cooper said...

Diamond, the gem that Botswana used, with the help of non-corrupt leaders, to propel itself into the modern world.

Doug said...

And ain't that a success story, Coop? Now they have the Number 1 Ladies' Detective Agency and everything.