Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Love

LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like caries and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.

2010 Update: Reason's envy of the appetite.

17 comments:

Ornery Owl of Naughty Netherworld Press and Readers Roost said...

In the immortal words of J. Geils, "Love stinks."

TLP said...

Love endures. It's passion that wans.

Of course I could be wrong. Maybe it's true that all you get when you fall in love is lies and pain and sorrow. Along with enough germs to catch pneumonia. (Or much, much worse these days.) A la Burt Bacharach. Okay: I'll never fall in love again.

Unknown said...

*muaaaah*

Anonymous said...

LOVE, n. - Is a many splendored thing? pffft

Ariel the Thief said...

Very funny definition, Doug! Someone said, love is common sense.

k. riggs gardner said...

I love the scene from Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me where Elvis Costello croons I'll never fall in Love again at an outdoor cafe while Burt Bacharach plays piano accompaniment as Austin and Felicity begin waltzing amongst cafe patrons.

I also love my newly-found proficiency with bold, italic and link HTML tags.

~*~

Jim said...

Love -- For a word like this you Could change your comment invite to X LOVES AND FRIENDS AND EDITORS
..

k. riggs gardner said...

Pathetic.

ghostseeker -- I saw the "Love Stinks" tour in San Francisco in 1980. I had the LP, too. One time I fell asleep and for some reason my stereo kept skipping on the title song. My upstairs neighbor almost broke her hand banging on the floor for me to turn the frikkin' music off.

Susan at Stony River said...

Well then I suppose I was cured... but once the cure is removed, is it possible to be re-infected? Or should I now buy one of those isolation tanks?
:-P

The Old Mule said...

Love: Short-acting admixture of chimera, treason and morphoid alkali that usually results in rent-seeking, befuddlement and asininity.

(sorry for deletes -- having trouble with google acct)

COOPER said...

Love: A rather gross club in D.C.

NicoleB, Kuwait said...

I like that disease, didn't get cured by marriage either. Maybe I'm a hopeless case ;)

quilly said...

My blog post today -- written HOURS before I had a chance to visit here, is 10 Reasons I Love Amoeba -- none of them included dysentery. Don't call the doctor.

k. riggs gardner said...

Woe is me ...

"I trudge along keeping smooth wrists far from sharp edges ..."

And I pray for illness and death and most of all, dysentary!

Doug The Una said...

Ghostseeker, if the J. Geils Band had sung "Love is a rose" we'd all have forgotten them by now.

TLP, did Burt Bacharach catch a disease? And will nobody speak for the defendant?

Karma, just in time!

Thom, pffft indeed.

Ariel, whoever said that, I suspect, had neither at the time.

Very nice tagging, Karen. I never saw that movie, though.

Funny, Jim, but two categories does the trick for the third.

That's terrible, Karen. How were you supposed to sleep with all that floor banging?

Susan, I'm a proponent of isolation tanks, generally. Blogs work pretty well.

Mule, it's good to hear from you, old chum. Your return for this particular word reminds me of this particular post.

Cooper, I guess the name "Power" was already taken.

Nicole, sometimes the symptoms can be limited to gloating.

Quilly, wouldn't dream of it.

Karen, don't tempt.

k. riggs gardner said...

Doug, you already know I'm sick to Death of this blog.

What am I supposed to be tempting you with -- famine and plague?

Doug The Una said...

Karen, I'm pretty sure you're here voluntarily, many times each day. Please continue if you enjoy yourself but nobody will resent you for finding more enjoyable diversions.