Friday, June 19, 2009

Fork

FORK, n. An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth. Formerly the knife was employed for this purpose, and by many worthy persons is still thought to have many advantages over the other tool, which, however, they do not altogether reject, but use to assist in charging the knife. The immunity of these persons from swift and awful death is one of the most striking proofs of God's mercy to those that hate Him.

2009 Update: The place between plate and urn in the civilized life cycle.

17 comments:

quilly said...

First? Always my favorite thing to be when forks are in play.

Nessa said...

Fork: The confusing part of the road.

pia said...

I was going to say "that place in the road I'm constantly stuck" but Nessa sort of beat me to it as I'm stuck in the...

Jamie Dawn said...

I've heard of a forked tongue. Speaking of tongues, have you seen those split tongues? I must be getting old because I thought a pierced tongue was a stupid idea, and now those split tongues just freak the heck outta me. They are hitonious, hideous, and horrid all all together.

TLP said...

Fork: A many splintered spoon.

Jim said...

Fork is a tool used by boys to speer food from others' plates. It is especially despised by little sisters.
..

weirsdo said...

A chess maneuver whereby one threatens more than one of the opponent's pieces simultaneously. Being eminently civilized, chess has no knife, but only forks, pins, and skewers.

Flip said...

Speaking of forks, it's almost time to throw something together for dinner.

Tom & Icy said...

You encounter sundry forks when you walk the straight and narrow path, most of them pitch forks. The Devil sticks a fork in you to see if you are done yet. But don't they look funny when they eat pizza with a fork?

Karen said...

Sometimes I put two flavors of pizza on the same plate. I use a knife and fork to make mincemeat out of it.

Ariel the Thief said...

Bye, bye, my comment!

Anonymous said...

was in that ,place,today-
nine hours at dentist
boy did i have to
,fork,over the cash
Peace

Doug The Una said...

Knives too, Quilly?

Particularly, Nessa, If Robert Frost is blathering along beside you.

Spoon, Pia?

Good grief, JD! On a person?

Funny, blogmama.

Jim, they thank us when they grow up, don't they?

Weirsdo, is there a tear gas gambit?

Bon appetit, Flip.

Actonbell, it hardly seems important on pizza night.

Demons, you mean, Icy? I'm having trouble following.

Nice serving suggestion, Karen.

Did it get eaten, Ariel. Sorry for that.

Yow, Bear. Good for you, though.

cooper said...

Not in the habit of putting dead animals in my mouth I prefer chopsticks.

sauerkraut said...

a hockey cheer uses 4 forks. or is that 4 q's... I forget.

weirsdo said...

I don't know for sure, but that sounds too tentative, RBUD.

Doug The Una said...

Of course you do, Coop. You're a civilized gal.

Gosh, Sauerkraut, I dunno.

Weirsdo, how about a spit? I guess a skewer counts.